Biorythyms
At some point in the past year I transitioned from being a 1:00 AM - 8:30 AM sleeper to being a 9:00 PM - 6:00 AM sleeper. At least a dozen times I have fallen asleep while putting my son to bed at 8:00 PM and woken up in a confused daze at 3:00 AM in his bed. In most cases, I have skipped dinner the night before, and so my mind instantly starts to think of ways to secure food at that difficult hour. If you know anything about our shopping habits, you will know we dont keep a stocked fridge, so I start peeling open a rapid succession of string cheese packages, or devouring a bowl of children's cereal (Gorilla Munch or Cliford Crunch) -- anything to halt to my decline into an emaciated skeleton. How did my biorythyms get so messed up?
This transition seems to happen to most people soon after having a child. It took a little while to catch up to me. I think that for the first year of my son's life, I was physically incapable of making the change -- the late night habit was too deeply ingrained in me from 15 years of being on the midnight creep. (Did I tell you that my entire life my Dad has never really gone to sleep? He only snoozes in front of the TV without ever actually committing to going up to bedtime. At some ungodly hour, perhaps 3 AM, he might go upstairs for a couple hours in the sack, but that is just an unverified rumor.) I used to watch a lot of Nick-at-Nite back in my 20's, and so an Andy Griffith marathon would give me something to fixate on until late into the night. Now I never touch the TV, and so I dont really see much of a reason to be up late any more.
I make a half-hearted effort to stave off middle age, and stay up late once in a while but my success ratio is dwindling. In the past month, I have intended to see four bands: The Wrens, Yo La Tengo, The Beatings, and The Mountain Goats. I only attended one of those shows (The Beatings). Iinwardly I found it quite arduous to stand in some dumpy club through 3 opening bands while waiting for my band to come in around midnight. I couldnt summon enough energy to attend the other three snow. My wife has had the mantra of "not on a school night" for several years. I guess that I have to concede that I no longer have the energy to go to the clubs on a programming night.
Tonight, I am watching our son while my wife and mother-in-law go out with their various friends for dinner. I have made plans with my friend to go to a late night showing of The Departed tonight at 10:50 PM or so. Right now, it is only 8:45 and I am yawning my ass off. Who am I kidding? Do I really think that I can stay up for two more hours, and then sit through a three hour Scorcese epic? I've been up since 6 AM, damnit. I know for a fact my friend slept until 1 PM, because when I called him today for tennis, he had that unmistable still-asleep croak in his voice. Doesnt he know I have a kid? Why must I pretend that I can still keep up with the childless bachelors? People with children are an entirely different species than those without. Age catches up to everyone, but when you have a kid, the parameters are life are more rigidly enforced. Anyways, I will try to put on a macho front and go through with it. A little coffee should get me through. But when I emerge from the confines of the megaplex in the wee hours of the morning, I will stumble like a zombie into the nearest bed...he will likely go home and put in a few more hours of online poker.
This transition seems to happen to most people soon after having a child. It took a little while to catch up to me. I think that for the first year of my son's life, I was physically incapable of making the change -- the late night habit was too deeply ingrained in me from 15 years of being on the midnight creep. (Did I tell you that my entire life my Dad has never really gone to sleep? He only snoozes in front of the TV without ever actually committing to going up to bedtime. At some ungodly hour, perhaps 3 AM, he might go upstairs for a couple hours in the sack, but that is just an unverified rumor.) I used to watch a lot of Nick-at-Nite back in my 20's, and so an Andy Griffith marathon would give me something to fixate on until late into the night. Now I never touch the TV, and so I dont really see much of a reason to be up late any more.
I make a half-hearted effort to stave off middle age, and stay up late once in a while but my success ratio is dwindling. In the past month, I have intended to see four bands: The Wrens, Yo La Tengo, The Beatings, and The Mountain Goats. I only attended one of those shows (The Beatings). Iinwardly I found it quite arduous to stand in some dumpy club through 3 opening bands while waiting for my band to come in around midnight. I couldnt summon enough energy to attend the other three snow. My wife has had the mantra of "not on a school night" for several years. I guess that I have to concede that I no longer have the energy to go to the clubs on a programming night.
Tonight, I am watching our son while my wife and mother-in-law go out with their various friends for dinner. I have made plans with my friend to go to a late night showing of The Departed tonight at 10:50 PM or so. Right now, it is only 8:45 and I am yawning my ass off. Who am I kidding? Do I really think that I can stay up for two more hours, and then sit through a three hour Scorcese epic? I've been up since 6 AM, damnit. I know for a fact my friend slept until 1 PM, because when I called him today for tennis, he had that unmistable still-asleep croak in his voice. Doesnt he know I have a kid? Why must I pretend that I can still keep up with the childless bachelors? People with children are an entirely different species than those without. Age catches up to everyone, but when you have a kid, the parameters are life are more rigidly enforced. Anyways, I will try to put on a macho front and go through with it. A little coffee should get me through. But when I emerge from the confines of the megaplex in the wee hours of the morning, I will stumble like a zombie into the nearest bed...he will likely go home and put in a few more hours of online poker.
posted by itchy at 5:38 PM
1 Comments:
Well concluded entry, zombie boy!
Yes, it has taken you YEARS to adjust... You are just genetically really sleepy. Do you realize that you still take a nap every weekend day, pretty much? Though I agree that having a kid makes one really exhausted, and I am in theory totally in favor of napping anyway. But from since I met you fourteen years ago until the past eight months or so, you've been physically incapable of waking up in the mornings, and going to work at 10AM or later (truthfully, it used to hurt my feelings that you didn't care about missing dinner with us in the old days because you'd rather sleep in and work late).
So kudos to you for getting your ass outta bed! Just kidding... though I am a bit offended at your slighting of my frigidaire. You most certainly need to eat, but it's not like you ever do any grocery shopping. Besides, I don't know what you're talking about--didn't you see the large and fruitful assemblage of broccoli in the crisper?!?
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