Two Totally Futile Actions

1. Pushing the "Close Door" button on an elevator. Has anyone ever noticed any correlation whatsoever between the pushing of the button and the speed of the door closing? I haven't. People hammer away at them to alleviate the embarassment of standing in an enclosed space with a stranger. People, they don't work. From a more abstract viewpoint, buttons are the wrong design metaphor for the "close door" feature. The existence of a button implies that something will immediately happen when you push it -- a buzzer will go off, a light will turn on, a trap door will open, a death ray will shoot from an overhead laser gun and destroy the guy next to you, etc... Pushing a "Close Door" button or a traffic light button for that matter, is a request for something to happen in the short term future.


2. Asking someone to raise their voice for an extended period of time. When a mumbler is giving a presentation at work, for example, someone will always ask them to raise their volume. People cannot do this. People have grown up their entire lives with their current voice volume, and cannot speak at a volume higher than that without feeling acutely self-conscious and embarrassed. They might raise their voice for 10 seconds but then will instantly revert back to the original volume.